Kinky Christmas gifts: BDSM advent calendar, bondage sets and fetish gear by budget

For someone new to kink, give a soft starter set with fur-lined cuffs, a blindfold and a feather, or fill a stocking with small pieces from the under 25 shelf. For someone who already plays, choose one serious piece they will use for years, such as a complete bondage kit in a bag or a leather spreader bar. If you want a gift that lasts all December, the Le Désir advent calendar holds eight wrapped surprises of lingerie and vibrating toys, and you can build your own BDSM advent calendar from small kinky items.

Everything below comes from our gift shop, with the full selection on the Christmas gifts shelf. Use this page to pick by budget, by person and by experience.

The BDSM advent calendar

A ready-made advent calendar

The Le Désir Advent Calendar is a multi-gift box with eight surprises, ranging from sensual lingerie pieces to vibrating toys. This is the plus size version, so the lingerie suits fuller figures. The box comes with interchangeable sleeves, which means you can use it again for a birthday or anniversary after Christmas. With eight gifts instead of twenty-four, open one every three days through December or save them for the weekends.

Build your own kinky advent calendar

A homemade calendar is often more personal than a bought one. Take 24 small bags or envelopes and fill them with a mix of small toys from the gifts under 25 shelf and handwritten vouchers: a massage, a night where your partner picks the toy, ten minutes blindfolded, a new position from the dice. Put the gentle items in the first week and keep restraints and clamps for later, after you have talked about limits. That way the calendar turns into a slow, playful build-up to a bigger scene on Christmas Eve.

Under 25: stocking fillers and first steps

• Best first restraint: Ouch Beginner's Furry Handcuffs. The fur lining takes pressure off the wrists, and a quick-release button opens them even if the key goes missing.
• Best for sensory play for two: Crushious Satin Blindfold Twin Pack. One black and one red blindfold with an elastic band, so you can take turns.
• Best ice-breaker: S-Line Kink Dice. Each roll combines a foreplay technique with a position, which gives you something concrete to discuss and agree on.
• Best first clamps: Crushious Nipple Chain Clamps. Screw adjustment from a light pinch to a real bite, rubber tips and a chain for gentle tugging.
• Best mini kit: Crushious Lover's Dream. A satin blindfold, two feather ticklers and furry handcuffs with quick release in one red box.
• Best steel gift for him: Crushious Saruman. Three stainless steel cock rings from 3.8 to 5 cm in diameter, for men who already know their size; warm or cool the steel for temperature play.

Under 50: a proper starter set

• Best complete starter kit: Crushious Dungeons & Maidens. Eight pieces: wrist and ankle cuffs, rope, a collar with removable leash, ball gag, whip and blindfold, with plush lining against chafing.
• Best bed bondage for couples: Crushious Universal Bed Restraints. Nylon straps run under most mattresses and end in velcro cuffs; no tools needed and packed away just as fast.
• Best for temperature play: XR Brands Drip Sensation. Unscented paraffin candles with a low melting temperature of 50 degrees and a zinc alloy scraper for removing the wax.
• Best fetish wear for her: De Namour Faux Leather Two-Piece Set. Faux leather with metal chain details, a look that is daring without feeling like a costume.

More ideas in this price range are on the gifts under 50 shelf.

Luxury gifts for serious players

• Best all-in-one kit: Ouch Venice Collection. A black handbag with a collar and leash, handcuffs, ankle cuffs, blindfold, breathable ball gag, flogger, under-the-mattress restraints and a rechargeable vibrating bullet.
• Best next step after the basics: Ouch Intermediate Bondage Set. Nine pieces including ten metres of Japanese silk rope and a hogtie connector, so you can move beyond simple cuffing.
• Best leather piece: Red Leather Compact Spreader Bar. Extends from 35 to 60 cm, with padded leather cuffs attached that fit wrists or ankles of 23 to 38 cm around.
• Best gift that lasts all month: the Le Désir advent calendar described above.

The luxury gifts shelf has more leather, electro and furniture.

Kinky gifts compared

Gifts for her, for him and for couples

For her, think about what she already enjoys. Fetish lingerie and a collar suit someone who likes to dress up for a scene, while a blindfold and feather suit someone who loves anticipation. Browse the gifts for her shelf for lingerie, vibrators and sensation toys.

For him, steel cock rings, chastity and cock and ball toys are classic kinky gifts, but size matters, so only buy rings when you know his fit. The gifts for him shelf groups the safest choices.

For couples, the best gifts are the ones you open and use together: under-bed restraints, a full kit or the dice. See the gifts for couples shelf.

For beginners or for the experienced

A beginner needs gear that is forgiving: soft cuffs with quick release, a blindfold, a feather, light clamps. The kinky starter gifts shelf only holds pieces like these, and our guide to BDSM gear for beginners explains what to buy first. For handcuffs in particular, read which handcuffs and restraints are best, and before giving clamps, nipple clamps for beginners.

Someone experienced usually already owns the basics. Give them an upgrade instead: real leather that develops a patina, a spreader bar, silk rope or wax. Ask a careful question or two first; a duplicate of something they love is still better than a toy they will never use.

Gift sets and gift cards

Gift sets are the easiest choice when you are unsure: bondage kits, cock ring sets, lube trios and couples sets come ready to wrap. If you really do not know their taste or size, a gift card lets them choose, and it fits in a Christmas card.

Discreet packaging and Christmas deadlines

Every order is shipped in a plain box with no logo and no sender name, so nothing gives away what is inside, even if it lands with family or at the office. The order deadlines for Christmas are listed on our shipping and returns page.

Consent and safety with kinky gifts

A kinky gift is an invitation, not an obligation. Give it privately, talk about what you both want to try and agree on a safeword before the first scene. With restraints, keep a finger of space under every cuff, check hands and feet for tingling or colour change and never leave someone alone while restrained. Take clamps off after a few minutes at first. With wax, test the temperature on your own arm and keep a towel underneath. Use water-based lube with toys and clean everything with a toy cleaner afterwards.

Frequently asked questions